For a lot of people, saying no to other peoples requests is a very difficult thing. I call this the “Golden Retriever Affect”. You want to make sure that everyone around you is happy, so you say yes to every request that is made of you.
By the end of the day, or the week, you feel so overwhelmed and stressed out, due to all of the new commitments, that you can’t seem to get anything started, and you feel like giving up, because there is no way to get everything done, and certainly not done correctly! Overcommitting is one of the biggest reasons that we get stuck, and are not able to move forward on what really needs to be completed. So, how do we learn to say no? Well, politely of course. A simple, “I am sorry, but my current work load, does not give me the time to handle this project and complete what I have already committed to.” will normally do the trick, and almost everyone will understand that, since they are probably overcommitted as well. By not taking on more then you can handle, you will reduce your stress, and be able to complete your tasks, making you less anxious and happier. Taking care of your happiness first will allow you to help others later. I wish you success!
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TOO MANY DEMANDS AND UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS can make the holidays ho-ho-hum. The holiday season can be magical, filled with festive celebrations and special times with family and friends. But for many, it’s also a time of frantic activity. Fitting in extra tasks like shopping, decorating and entertaining as well as attending many social gatherings in just a few weeks can seem overwhelming. Here are five strategies to help put the joy back in the season.
Adults who are dealing with the challenges of AD/HD can feel even more pressure at holiday time. See the full article at [Chadd.org] Not everyday is going to be an ultra productive day. As I fought through this afternoon, I found myself worrying about not getting enough accomplished; and that what I was accomplishing might not be the most important. Thank you ADHD, but I kept moving forward, doing things a little bit at a time, and taking a break when and if I needed one.
Then it dawned on me, that just by sitting down and working on something caused this to actually be a productive day. I marked things off my to-do list and started to feel better about my day. That’s when I realized that I was being productive, and that every day does not have to be a “perfect day” for me to feel good about it, and myself. So rejoice in your ability to just move forward and give yourself the compassion that you always give to everyone else. I found this excerpt and just wanted to share.
I need to remember what it says! Everybody makes mistakes at one time or another, it’s a fact of life. And if you think about it, why should you expect anything different? Where is that written contract you signed before birth promising that you’d never fail, and that your life would go absolutely the way you want it to? Uh, excuse me. There must be some error. I signed up for the “everything will go swimmingly until the day I die” plan. Can I speak to the management? It’s absurd, and yet most of us act as if something has gone terribly awry when we fall down or life takes an unwanted or unexpected turn. -----Self-Compassion: Stop Beating Yourself Up and Leave Insecurity Behind Kristin Neff I find that feeling good about your life is one of the keys to happiness and contentment, and feeling good starts with gratitude! Take stock of your life, and the good things in it, and say “Thank You”! Before your feet hit the ground in the morning say “Thank You”. List out the things in your life that you are grateful for, and that make you happy and remember them!
To help me do this I keep a small set of beads in my pants pocket, and every time I touch them it reminds me to think of something I am grateful for. I carry these with me all of the time and it helps me remember to be happy! |
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